A House in the Sky by Amanda Lindhout

“I've realized that the world is, in essence, full of banana peels - loaded with things that may unwittingly trip an internal wire in my mind, opening a floodgate of fears without warning.”

The dramatic and redemptive memoir of a woman whose curiosity led her to the world’s most beautiful and remote places, its most imperiled and perilous countries, and then into fifteen months of harrowing captivity—an exquisitely written story of courage, resilience, and grace.

As a child, Amanda Lindhout escaped a violent household by paging through issues of National Geographic and imagining herself in its exotic locales. At the age of nineteen, working as a cocktail waitress in Calgary, Alberta, she began saving her tips so she could travel the globe. Aspiring to understand the world and live a significant life, she backpacked through Latin America, Laos, Bangladesh, and India, and emboldened by each adventure, went on to Sudan, Syria, and Pakistan. In war-ridden Afghanistan and Iraq she carved out a fledgling career as a television reporter. And then, in August 2008, she traveled to Somalia—“the most dangerous place on earth.” On her fourth day, she was abducted by a group of masked men along a dusty road.

Held hostage for 460 days, Amanda converts to Islam as a survival tactic, receives “wife lessons” from one of her captors, and risks a daring escape. Moved between a series of abandoned houses in the desert, she survives on memory—every lush detail of the world she experienced in her life before captivity—and on strategy, fortitude, and hope. When she is most desperate, she visits a house in the sky, high above the woman kept in chains, in the dark, being tortured.

Vivid and suspenseful, as artfully written as the finest novel, A House in the Sky is the searingly intimate story of an intrepid young woman and her search for compassion in the face of unimaginable adversity.

I battled with myself to keep going through this story - when I was reading about her earlier travels and life I just wanted to hear about the kidnapping, but once I got to that part, even though I genuinely wanted to keep reading it, but I had to stop and have breaks to mentally prepare myself to keep going because they were so shocking and heartbreaking.

Parts of it were so saddening that I have to questions if any of it was embellished, I just can't believe that someone would go through something so terrible - especially when managing to remind themselves to stay positive and even feel some kind of sympathy for her kidnappers!  

“By concentrating on what I was grateful for, I was able to stave off despair.” 

Well done to Linkhout for surviving and seemingly growing from something so huge and life changing. Now that I've finished reading her story, I feel like doing to Hunger Games salute for her. The strength of her mind is amazing.

“It's only your body that's suffering, and you are not your body. The rest of you is fine.” 

Read my review on Goodreads

The Elegant Art of Falling Apart by Jessica Jones

"After cancer, every gift seems like a treasure. Every day is special. Some are simply magical."

Inspiring, unflinchingly honest, and laugh out loud hilarious, The Elegant Art of Falling Apart shows us how, sometimes, we have to lose everything to understand that the moment is all we have. And living that moment with style, grace and a damn good lipstick is all that matters.

Jessica Jones had a complicated life. Booze, cocaine, bad boyfriends – it was a rollercoaster ride of what self help writers call ‘opportunities for growth’ But she got way from all that. She rebuilt her career, became prosperous and, at last, found happiness in a wonderful, new relationship. 

Just when things were almost perfect... she learned that she had breast cancer. Jessica did what she’s always done, she got through it. After seven months of gruelling treatments she travelled from London to Sydney to begin a three-month holiday of a lifetime with her gorgeous man - only to find herself plunged into a different, and totally unexpected, life crisis. 

A story of courage, friendship and laughter that gives us hope that, no matter what, we can always start again.

Its been a few weeks since I finished reading this book, and although I've been busy, I was also putting off writing down my thoughts on this book because when it comes to Memoirs, I really don't like to seem too critical. It must take so much guts to write down your personal story, especially when you can't hide behind a fictional character/setting.

When I first started reading this book, I thought it was going to be one of those books that I just had to tell my girlfriends to read - it was raw, inspiring and important. But somewhere along the way I lost touch with the author and I couldn't relate to her personality as much - even though I have never had depression, an addiction OR cancer. Maybe it is through my own fault and I was shying away from the harsh truth of depression, but I just couldn't relate to her 'love addiction' and the fact that she was struggling so much to let go of what seemed like such a toxic relationship. To me that overshadowed the positive way she seemed to tackle her cancer treatment. 

But overall, I think this book would be helpful for someone who has a close friend or family member diagnosed with cancer and going through treatment, and even to someone healthy who just wants a reminder not to take that fact for granted. 

Look Me in the Eye: My Life with Asperger's by John Elder Robison

“My conversational difficulties highlight a problem Aspergians face every day. A person with an obvious disability—for example, someone in a wheelchair—is treated compassionately because his handicap is obvious. No one turns to a guy in a wheelchair and says, “Quick! Let’s run across the street!” And when he can’t run across the street, no one says, “What’s his problem?” They offer to help him across the street. With me, though, there is no external sign that I am conversationally handicapped. So folks hear some conversational misstep and say, “What an arrogant jerk!” I look forward to the day when my handicap will afford me the same respect accorded to a guy in a wheelchair. And if the respect comes with a preferred parking space, I won’t turn it down.” 
― John Elder Robison, Look Me in the Eye: My Life with Asperger's

Ever since he was small, John Robison had longed to connect with other people, but by the time he was a teenager, his odd habits—an inclination to blurt out non sequiturs, avoid eye contact, dismantle radios, and dig five-foot holes (and stick his younger brother in them)—had earned him the label “social deviant.” No guidance came from his mother, who conversed with light fixtures, or his father, who spent evenings pickling himself in sherry. It was no wonder he gravitated to machines, which could, at least, be counted on.

After fleeing his parents and dropping out of high school, his savant-like ability to visualize electronic circuits landed him a gig with KISS, for whom he created their legendary fire-breathing guitars. Later, he drifted into a “real” job, as an engineer for a major toy company. But the higher Robison rose in the company, the more he had to pretend to be “normal” and do what he simply couldn’t: communicate. It wasn’t worth the paycheck.

It was not until he was forty that an insightful therapist told him he had the form of autism called Asperger’s syndrome. That understanding transformed the way Robison saw himself—and the world.

Look Me in the Eye is the moving, darkly funny story of growing up with Asperger’s at a time when the diagnosis simply didn’t exist. A born storyteller, Robison takes you inside the head of a boy whom teachers and other adults regarded as “defective,” who could not avail himself of KISS’s endless supply of groupies, and who still has a peculiar aversion to using people’s given names (he calls his wife “Unit Two”). He also provides a fascinating reverse angle on the younger brother he left at the mercy of their nutty parents—the boy who would later change his name to Augusten Burroughs and write the bestselling memoir Running with Scissors.

Ultimately, this is the story of Robison’s journey from his world into ours, and his new life as a husband, father, and successful small business owner—repairing his beloved high-end automobiles. It’s a strange, sly, indelible account—sometimes alien, yet always deeply human.

I enjoyed this book so much more than I was expecting too. I pictured it to be dryly written and have the weight of a textbook, instead I found it insightful, interesting and humorous.

The first section focused on Robinson's early childhood and home life, and I found this part depressing and so sad, but that just makes his achievement to overcome his challenges with  Aspergers so much more incredible. How many other people throughout history that achieved great things in their chosen field, might have had a similar spectrum condition?

I didn't really have much of an understanding of Aspergers prior to reading this, but I'm glad I did, as I feel like I would be able to assist them with feeling comfortable with the conversation and then appreciate their unique ability.  I can see how this novel would be very important to help educate school aged children to be more tolerant and understanding to their peers, regardless of any diagnosis.

All Creatures Great and Small (All Creatures Great and Small #1) by James Herriot

“...without warning, the thermometer disappeared from my fingers. Some sudden suction had drawn it inside the cow. I ran my fingers round just inside the rectum—nothing; I pushed my hand inside without success; with a feeling of rising panic I rolled up my sleeve and groped about in vain.” 

Delve into the magical, unforgettable world of James Herriot, the world's most beloved veterinarian, and his menagerie of heartwarming, funny, and tragic animal patients.

For over forty years, generations of readers have thrilled to Herriot's marvelous tales, deep love of life, and extraordinary storytelling abilities. For decades, Herriot roamed the remote, beautiful Yorkshire Dales, treating every patient that came his way from smallest to largest, and observing animals and humans alike with his keen, loving eye.

In All Creatures Great and Small, we meet the young Herriot as he takes up his calling and discovers that the realities of veterinary practice in rural Yorkshire are very different from the sterile setting of veterinary school. Some visits are heart-wrenchingly difficult, such as one to an old man in the village whose very ill dog is his only friend and companion, some are lighthearted and fun, such as Herriot's periodic visits to the overfed and pampered Pekinese Tricki Woo who throws parties and has his own stationery, and yet others are inspirational and enlightening, such as Herriot's recollections of poor farmers who will scrape their meager earnings together to be able to get proper care for their working animals. From seeing to his patients in the depths of winter on the remotest homesteads to dealing with uncooperative owners and critically ill animals, Herriot discovers the wondrous variety and never-ending challenges of veterinary practice as his humor, compassion, and love of the animal world shine forth.

Such an interesting life and job! I loved reading about a careers that's very different to my own line of work, but also the countryside and lifestyle could not be more different that where I live. 

Rather than following the traditional flow of beginning > middle > plot twist > end, this is a series of memories from his beginning as a country vet. Sometimes I struggled with this format as it made it seem to go on for longer, but in the end the topic was enough to fascinate me and keep me wanting to finish.

Brain on Fire: My Month of Madness by Susannah Cahalan

“Maybe it’s true what Thomas Moore said: “It is only through mystery and madness that the soul is revealed.” 

A gripping memoir and medical suspense story about a young New York Post reporter’s struggle with a rare and terrifying disease, opening a new window into the fascinating world of brain science.

One day, Susannah Cahalan woke up in a strange hospital room, strapped to her bed, under guard, and unable to move or speak. Her medical records—from a month-long hospital stay of which she had no memory—showed psychosis, violence, and dangerous instability. Yet, only weeks earlier she had been a healthy, ambitious twenty-four year old, six months into her first serious relationship and a sparkling career as a cub reporter.

Susannah’s astonishing memoir chronicles the swift path of her illness and the lucky, last-minute intervention led by one of the few doctors capable of saving her life. As weeks ticked by and Susannah moved inexplicably from violence to catatonia, $1 million worth of blood tests and brain scans revealed nothing. The exhausted doctors were ready to commit her to the psychiatric ward, in effect condemning her to a lifetime of institutions, or death, until Dr. Souhel Najjar—nicknamed Dr. House—joined her team. He asked Susannah to draw one simple sketch, which became key to diagnosing her with a newly discovered autoimmune disease in which her body was attacking her brain, an illness now thought to be the cause of “demonic possessions” throughout history.

With sharp reporting drawn from hospital records, scientific research, and interviews with doctors and family, Brain on Fire is a crackling mystery and an unflinching, gripping personal story that marks the debut of an extraordinary writer. 

Whoa, what an amazing story! I've given myself a little time to try and articulate how I feel now I have finished reading this book, and I'm still blown away by it - how honestly it is written, trying to get my head around how remarkable yet fragile the body is (especially the brain) and what it must have been like to go through something like that, and return to 'normal' within a relatively short period of time. 

Towards the end of the book Cahalan says she wouldn't wish it on anyone but that it made her grateful to go through something like this, and I can see why (as well as anyone can without having a similar experience to reference personally anyway) it would completely adjust your thinking and make you appreciate everything so much more. You really can't take your health for granted, especially the heath of your brain!

As I was reading this I googled several things that were referenced in the book, particularly Teratoma and Susannah Cahalan, because I wanted to see what they both looked like. Both were very confronting in completely different ways. Some of the Teratoma was quite scary looking, and so too were some images that came up of Susannah while she was in hospital. But when you look at pictures of her now, you would never guess that she had been through any kind of ordeal, let alone one so significant and life changing.

It was great to hear that from her article and book that there have been a lot more cases correctly identified of the disease - irregardless of any money made, that is a great way to judge the competence and success of her writing, remarkable when you learn how close she came to losing that skill. 

I have seen online that they are making this story in to a movie - I imagine it would be a ridiculously hard character to play, it will be interesting to see it.

https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/13547180-brain-on-fire

Wild: From Lost to Found on the Pacific Crest Trail by Cheryl Strayed

“The thing about hiking the Pacific Crest Trail, the thing that was so profound to me that summer—and yet also, like most things, so very simple—was how few choices I had and how often I had to do the thing I least wanted to do. How there was no escape or denial. No numbing it down with a martini or covering it up with a roll in the hay. As I clung to the chaparral that day, attempting to patch up my bleeding finger, terrified by every sound that the bull was coming back, I considered my options. There were only two and they were essentially the same. I could go back in the direction I had come from, or I could go forward in the direction I intended to go.” 

At twenty-two, Cheryl Strayed thought she had lost everything. In the wake of her mother’s death, her family scattered and her own marriage was soon destroyed. Four years later, with nothing more to lose, she made the most impulsive decision of her life. With no experience or training, driven only by blind will, she would hike more than a thousand miles of the Pacific Crest Trail from the Mojave Desert through California and Oregon to Washington State — and she would do it alone.
Told with suspense and style, sparkling with warmth and humor, Wildpowerfully captures the terrors and pleasures of one young woman forging ahead against all odds on a journey that maddened, strengthened, and ultimately healed her. 

I love travel books - hearing about new places I've never been to, remembering places I have already seen, sharing experiences with others during their travels. 

Before I started reading this book, I thought it would be a pretty standard travel book, someone visits somewhere and writes about what they saw, who they met, and a little complication they have to overcome, such as a lost passport or a tropical illness etc. I guess in essence this book does cover those things, but what surprised me was that there is a deeper story that makes it much more compelling to read. 

Straight away the prologue lets you know exactly what it's all about. It finished in such an uplifting and mysterious was that I was hooked straight away, and I couldn't  wait to hear more about her story - how she ended up hiking the PCT, things that happened while she was there, and what happened after.

Another thing that surprised me, was hearing her describe her Mum's battle and loss to cancer. I've heard people talk about themselves or a loved one getting sick and then either surviving or dying, but I am lucky to be quite naive about what happens in between the diagnosis and end result, so this was the first time I had actually ever heard or thought about it too much. Strayed spoke about the effects of her Mum's cancer treatment (on both her Mum physically, and for herself emotionally) in detail but still respectfully, so you could tell she really loved her Mother very much.

By the end of this book I was ready to go on an adventure myself, or at least think about what kind of 'great achievement' I could do in the future! 

The Secret Race: Inside the Hidden World of the Tour de France: Doping, Cover-ups, and Winning at All Costs by Tyler Hamilton & Daniel Coyle

“I discovered when I went all out, when I put 100 percent of my energy into some intense, impossible task - when my heart was jack-hammering, when lactic acid was sizzling through my muscles - that's when I felt good, normal, balanced.” 

The Secret Race is a definitive look at the world of professional cycling—and the doping issue surrounding this sport and its most iconic rider, Lance Armstrong—by former Olympic gold medalist Tyler Hamilton andNew York Times bestselling author Daniel Coyle.

Over the course of two years, Coyle conducted more than two hundred hours of interviews with Hamilton and spoke candidly with numerous teammates, rivals, and friends. The result is an explosive book that takes us, for the first time, deep inside a shadowy, fascinating, and surreal world of unscrupulous doctors, anything-goes team directors, and athletes so relentlessly driven to succeed that they would do anything—and take any risk, physical, mental, or moral—to gain the edge they need to win.

Tyler Hamilton was once one of the world’s best-liked and top-ranked cyclists—a fierce competitor renowned among his peers for his uncanny endurance and epic tolerance for pain. In the 2003 Tour de France, he finished fourth despite breaking his collarbone in the early stages—and grinding eleven of his teeth down to the nerves along the way. He started his career with the U.S. Postal Service team in the 1990s and quickly rose to become Lance Armstrong’s most trusted lieutenant, and a member of his inner circle. For the first three of Armstrong’s record seven Tour de France victories, Hamilton was by Armstrong’s side, clearing his way. But just weeks after Hamilton reached his own personal pinnacle—winning the gold medal at the 2004 Olympics—his career came to a sudden, ignominious end: He was found guilty of doping and exiled from the sport.

From the exhilaration of his early, naïve days in the peloton, Hamilton chronicles his ascent to the uppermost reaches of this unforgiving sport. In the mid-1990s, the advent of a powerful new blood-boosting drug called EPO reshaped the world of cycling, and a relentless, win-at-any-cost ethos took root. Its psychological toll would drive many of the sport’s top performers to substance abuse, depression, even suicide. For the first time ever, Hamilton recounts his own battle with clinical depression, speaks frankly about the agonizing choices that go along with the decision to compete at a world-class level, and tells the story of his complicated relationship with Lance Armstrong.

A journey into the heart of a never-before-seen world, The Secret Race is a riveting, courageous act of witness from a man who is as determined to reveal the hard truth about his sport as he once was to win the Tour de France.

I don't think I have ever read a sports biography before, or even follow/watch that much sport to be honest, so this book was something totally different for me to read, and I was surprised by how much I enjoyed it.

Before starting this book I didn't really know too much about professional cycling - I had no idea it was such a team sport, that there were strategies to attack etc, I didn't have a clue what the different coloured jumpers meant in the Tour de France, and I definitely didn't realise how naive I was when it came to doping in professional sports!

I found this novel very enlightening. Not just about the sport itself (I did learn a lot but it was so well written that I never once got bored or lost in the sports jargon - it felt like it was written for both those that understood the sport or had no knowledge at all), but prior to reading this book I would definitely have judged an athlete (in any sport) for taking performance enhancing drugs, and while I still don't think it is the right thing to do, reading this book made me realise how hard it would have been to say no to it in that environment, and I found it very interesting how they justified it to themselves (if everyone is doing it, then it just makes it an even playing field).

This book came across genuine, and I still think Tyler Hamilton sounds like a good guy, and I am in awe of his strength and determination, as a cyclist and now speaking to against doping.

One things for sure though, I will never look at professional/competitive sports the same way again!

Conquering Darkness - A Memoir of the Serial Killer's Wife by Crystal Reshawn Choyce-Lige and Alice M Swafford

Conquering Darkness, Memoir of the Serial Killer’s Wife is a painfully candid account of the lives of two black people who grew up together in West Oakland, California. Their story, would, in a few aspects, mirror the simple plot of “boy meets girl.” Everybody knows that story—right? Boy meets girl; they fall in love and live happily ever after. However, the lives of Alice Marie Swafford and William Jennings Choyce were woven together by the threads of early parental abandonment and gross parental abuse that came creeping in from their past. Alice’s father abandoned her at the delicate age of five. That early experience filled her with an insecurity she could not shake; this, in turn, gave birth to a fragile and emotional state of mind which made Alice desperate to find a man to replace her father and the love he gave to her. William, on the other hand, grew up with both his parents in the home, but he was emotionally and physically abused by his mother. He desperately struggled to love and to please her— but to no avail. William’s misguided search for love would take him on an ill-fated journey with all kinds of dark psychological twists and turns that ruptured his childhood and split his adult mind down the middle; one side was good, and one side was pure evil. This journey started, unbeknownst to Alice, long before she joined William in marriage.

But how would the young Alice know who she was really dealing with? It would take decades for her to truly understand that question. More importantly, how would Alice ever understand who she was and is now?

This memoir, written by Alice and her daughter, Crystal Choyce-Lige, provides an up close and honest retrospective account of what life was like with a budding serial rapist and serial murderer who flew under the radar of his family and law enforcement for decades. How? He was very, very clever and cunning. All the while he was playing the part of husband and father; he was also leaving the house every night for his well thought out and stakeouts to lure and prey upon the most vulnerable people in our society. The essential questions asked and then answered are: How and why could this nightmare happen and then last for so long? Why couldn’t Alice see what was right in front of her? The answers will enlighten as well as surprise those who embark upon the riveting adventure of reading this book.

I found this book really fascinating, and that is hard to say considering the subject of the book is the rape and murder of women. I find it so fascinating because I ask myself the question (as Alice does also throughout the book) "How could she not know?", and "Why did she stay with him so long?" Although she touches on her answer to these questions throughout the book, particularly towards the ending, I would have liked to see more of their normal day-to-day lives so I could understand the answers myself. I know she says he was charismatic and a chameleon, but I felt we were given so much information of his abusive and erratic side that I sometimes found it a little hard to swallow that anyone could actually stay with him for so long.

The story itself is an inspiration and I would recommend it to all women to read. It is an uncomfortable topic but thankfully we are spared from too much graphic detail - especially when compared to the graphic nature of some of the modern movies anyway.

The book reads well, and I have seen some reviews saying that it could use with some tidying up from an editor, but I honestly think that it is fine just the way it is, and the fact that it is so raw and comes across as their own personal diary adds to its authenticity.

I sincerely hope that Alice and Crystal have found the peace they so deserve. I will be recommending this book to all my girlfriends.